The Value of a Simple Goodbye... Is it too much to ask for?

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Have you ever come across a movie, where you just don’t want the movie to get over so you keep pausing and don’t watch it continuously? Currently, I am watching the movie, Julie and Julia. I have been watching it a little by little for three days. I just don’t want the movie to end. Some movies while watching, you know it’s going to be remarkable; you try hard to watch it slowly. Feeling the character’s emotions and their experiences.  Making scenarios in your head wishing you could be like that person. Someone who has an interesting personality that is unique, quirky and cool.

Another movie which I loved is Jojo rabbit. The ending of the movie was what I loved the most. Proper goodbyes are very important for me; the ending of a movie, story and relationship. One of the reasons I hate cliffhangers. The start of anything- a conversation, friendship, movie, etc is always a happy one. People don’t like small talk but that is peaceful for me.

"For me goodbyes stay forever."

Beginnings and endings are precious for me. The initial curiosity, beginning of a movie which makes you wonder where it is going to lead. Some movies take you on a journey, an emotional one. When a scene makes me happy, I pause and feel it by smiling, giggling and blushing. Closing my eyes and reminiscing the happy moments I had. When an aura of sadness consumes me, I feel it deep within because this feeling is not alien to me. I stop and close my eyes, take a deep breath and carry on with the movie. Movies with sad endings make me realize that I am breathing and it is okay if things don’t go the way you wanted to end it.

Slowly, in the journey of healing and knowing myself; I have come to an insight that goodbyes are crucial. No wonder I expect them in the movies I watch. Any relationship that I enter, I need that closure if it ends.

"Before rolling the end credits to our relationship - A goodbye is all I ask..." 

 Sometimes you don’t find it from that person. But I found it in the movies and my best friends who helped me go through it. I am thankful to them, for they always listened to me rant without judgments. I remember when I didn’t get the proper goodbye I wanted when I left an organization. My best friend from school listened to my endless talks; some of the talks went on repeat. Talking to her just helped me get it out of my INTERNAL HEAD BATTLE. Honestly it would be a faster and better recovery if I had just gone to a therapist. Since those rants and talk were just temporary. I still keep on going back and living in the past, regretting. 

So now I find the goodbyes, closure that I need in these movies I watch.  I really hope I always find the ending I need, sad, beautiful and tragic. I just used a Taylor Swift song as my ending to this blog.

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